I wrote and performed a sketch a few weeks ago for Highrock’s ArtSpeak.  ArtSpeak is an event where people within our church celebrate art – creating, displaying, and discussing art.  This year the theme was “Walk.”  I came up with the idea for my sketch by thinking about how a board game can be a lot like a walk, or a journey.  I used to play “The Game of Life” a lot as a kid – just ask Melissa or Chris about our crazy game modifications.  “The Game of Life” is a LOT like real life.  Recently I’ve been thinking about what our life is all about, what does it mean, what do we get out of it.  And more specifically, what makes a Christian life “Christian”?  Do Christians live for different things than other people?  Do we want the same things?  At the end of it all, does it really matter how we lived each day?  (Pastor Dave also talked about it on February 20 on Psalm 73, which just so happened to be the first Sunday after I figured out what I was going to write about.)  I wanted to explore this topic more and share my thoughts with my community.  A lot of what came out in the sketch are things that actually happened to me or someone close to me.

The performance itself went well.  As Stephen Taylor and I performed, we fed off of the crowd’s energy.  About 80% of the sketch was ad-libbed, and we both said lines that we hadn’t practiced.  There was even a line that Stephen said where I had to stifle a smile.  I’ve gotten many compliments about it and I wish I had a video of it.  (Will tried to videotape it on his phone, but it got corrupted when he tried to save it.)  So all I have are memories of it in my head.  I’d like to put what I remember in writing.  And for those of you who didn’t get to see it, I promise you it’s funnier than what you’re gonna read now.

“The Game of Christian Life”

Stephen: Hey Katherine, what are you doing?

Katherine: Oh, hi Stephen.  I just picked up this game from the store.  It’s called “The Game of Christian Life.”  Do you want to play?

Sure!

[Each player spins the wheel before their turn and moves the appropriate number of spaces.]

I’ll start on the “College” route.

What?  Lose a turn?  That sucks!  And what the heck are LIFE tiles?  Whatever.  Your turn.  Go.

Awesome!  $2,000!

What?  That’s so not fair!

You lost a turn, so I get to go again.

Win another $3,000?  Sweet!

Whatever!  You’ll probably just spend it on booze.

Alright, job search!  I get to pick an occupation and a salary card.

Teacher.  Well, I do like kids.  $30,000.  Alright.  Your turn.

I landed on “Job search” too.  Businessman!  And a $10,000 signing bonus?  Wow!  And my paycheck is $100,000!

What?!  How come I’m the teacher?

Okay.  Pay day.  And time to get married!  Hubby sits in the passenger seat where he belongs!

I get married too!

Buy a house.  I hope I get a good card!

Huh?  Why?!  Noooooo!

That’s an awesome house!

Gosh!  This game sucks!

Triplets!  Well, I do love kids.

$2,000 in gifts!

What?  Why do you get gifts?  I’m the one with triplets!

Marriage counseling?!

Ugh, that’s awful!

Hahaha!  You got a divorce!  Hahaha!  Pay up!

What?  Two more sessions?  Why does my marriage suck?

I got remarried!  Presents!!

You got presents?  What about me?

A tumor.  Great.  Collect yet another LIFE tile.

I knew my training would help me!

Whatever!  You probably took the T!

I was one spot off of collecting $200,000?  This is ridiculous!

Well, teachers shouldn’t be playing the stock market.

Oh, shut up!

Oh, this game is absurd!  It’s not fair!

Tithe?  I need that 10%!  I’ve got three kids!

Don’t you have to tithe?

No.  It says I get a TV!

What?!  Why do I have to tithe?

Why am I paying this?  I live with my in-laws!!

Oh, of course.  Gosh, let’s just end this game!  So what do we do to finish the game?

Let’s count up my money!  $400,000, $500,000, $600,000…

[Reads instructions.]  “When players reach the end of life, return cash to the bank.”

What?  Wait, let me see that.  “When players reach the end of life, return cash to the bank.”  What?!  What about all the money I made?!

Well, that’s easy for me to do.  I only had like $40,000…  What about all the LIFE tiles I collected?  [Reads instructions.]  “At the end of life, if a player has accumulated LIFE tiles, they should turn them over and read them  out loud.”

Oh my goodness!  I can’t believe I had these all along!  This is great!

How come I didn’t get any of those?

[Blackout.]

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